I will carry you

The first song that is on my blog is called "I will carry you(Audrey's song) by christian group Selah. This is such a moving story. My heart breaks everytime I hear this song and read this story. I know two people that have had stillbirths and of course my own experience with a miscarraige. As well as many other family and friends that have gone through this. I just wanted to share this.






In January, singer Todd Smith, of the contemporary Christian group Selah and his wife of close to 7 years, Angie, learned during Angie’s 20-week ultrasound that their fourth baby daughter, Audrey Caroline, had several serious conditions that were incompatible with life. Her lungs were not developing, her kidneys couldn’t function and there was an absence of amniotic fluid around her. Todd and Angie made the decision to carry baby Audrey to term, until it was time to say goodbye. “We decided that she would stay with us until the Lord takes her.”
Todd and Angie were told by doctors there was a slim chance she would survive the birthing process. Therefore, after discussing delivery options they planned a C-section in April to deliver Audrey at close to 33 weeks along.
Little Audrey Caroline Smith was born on April 7th at 4:31 pm, “with fiery red hair,” according to Angie’s blog. Todd and Angie chose the name “Audrey” after Angie’s long-time best friend, Audra and Audrey’s middle name “Caroline” after Angie’s middle name, Carole. She arrived weighing 3 lbs, 2 oz and was 15 inches in length. “When she was born, she made a few squeaks and noises, so Angie and Todd immediately knew she was breathing and alive. Audra said that she is simply beautiful and looks a lot like the twins looked when they were born.” Audrey’s heart rate was very low and she wasn’t expected to live very long. “Right now, everyone is simply spending time loving her.”
Sadly, Audrey lived only for a brief time; about 2 ½ hours. Despite Audrey‘s short life on Earth, those 2 ½ hours were truly a gift. “Audrey is now in heaven with the Lord. She passed around 6:45 central time. Everyone in the family is doing really well, all things considered, and they fervently believe that the time they had with Audrey was miraculous. The girls got to meet their sister and love on her too.” Audrey’s precious big sisters include: identical twins Abby and Ellie, 5 ½ and Sarah-Kate, 2.
Todd and Angie’s friend, Tom Uchida (of Uchida Photography), captured over 1,600 beautiful photos that day. Angie shares some of these priceless photos on her blog, along with a beautifully written letter to her little daughter. This deeply touching blog began soon after Todd and Angie received the life-changing news of Audrey’s fatal condition. It’s full of hopes and dreams .. faith and prayers. According to Angie’s friend, Jessica, who posted for her on the blog just two days after Audrey’s birth, “Angie and Todd have been blown away by the reach of Audrey’s story, just in the past three days this blog has received hits from every state in the US and more than 90 countries!” Bring The Rain- The Story of Audrey Caroline.
In honor of baby Audrey, Todd and Angie wrote a song, “I Will Carry You”, with their good friend Christa Wells. “It is deeply, profoundly meaningful to me,” Angie wrote. “We planned to play it at Audrey’s worship service, and I wanted to post it here for others who have walked through losing a child. We begged God to use it for this purpose…to make it meaningful to people.” According to Angie’s blog, “the song should be on the upcoming Selah record,” and that’s not all. There’s to be several pages in Selah’s newest CD booklet dedicated to little Audrey. After Angie learned of this, she wrote on her blog, “All of a sudden, I saw it for what it was. She is going to have a legacy. Long beyond what I can give her, what I can speak on her behalf, she will live in the notes of a song that was written in the purest form of love possible.”
Jake, the husband of Amy Perry (the newest member of the trio Selah), put together a slideshow for Audrey’s memorial service. Angie wrote, “It has been a prayer from the deepest part of me that God would use these words to minister to people who have experienced loss similar to mine. Although this is just the demo of the song (the final version will be recorded on my Birthday-May 19th!), I hope it speaks into any hurts that it finds.” Listen to the song, Bring The Rain and watch the Slideshow.
The pastor of Selah member Allan Hall’s church, Pete, made a powerful video of Todd and Angie’s story, which was shown at church as a part of its Plan B series. Go to Pete’s blog to experience the amazing 22-minute video. Allow yourselves to be forever impacted by the Smiths’ story, as I have. I have watched the slideshow and the video and I have also read Angie’s blog all the way through numerous times. I cried just as hard during the fourth reading, as the first night I read it. Not just because I can relate to so many of Angie’s emotions and feelings from losing my first daughter at 25 weeks along, but because I don’t see how anyone can read it without their heart being deeply touched.
Unthinkably, there have been two losses for Selah in less than two months. Audrey’s baby cousin passed away of SIDS only seven weeks after Audrey on the night of May 27th. Gregory Luke Sponberg was just 10 weeks old. He is the son of Greg and Nicol (a former member of Selah), who are Todd’s sister and brother-in-law. Little Gregory is also survived by sister, Summer (2), “who loved holding him, burping him, making him laugh, watching him in his swing and swiping his paci”. Baby Audrey and Baby Gregory, your ever-so-short lives here on Earth have changed the world! Please pray for the Smith and Sponberg families as they grieve.